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Sunday, June 22, 2008

The "Horrible" Na Nachman Cult

Here is a letter that I sent to a site that had a negative article about nanach calling it a cult and even going as far to say that it was better for teens to remain non religious then to become nanach.


I am a member of the Na Nach cult and would like to tell you and your readers that we have an active campaign for abducting American teenagers on their "year in Israel" and turning them into fanatical members of our cult.

We have already brainwashed a number of students from prominent yeshivas and initiated them into our fanatical nanach cult. We plan on continuing and there is really nothing you can do to stop us.

Here are some of our cult practices.

We wake up in middle of the night, dip in freezing rivers then go alone into the woods and scream for hours.

We shave our heads besides for leaving two dreadlocks from the side. This is to separate our members from society and bind them to our cult. We let our beards grow loose and wild resembling the ancient Judean tribes. We walk around with blue fringes hanging out of the side of our cloths and wear large white skull caps embedded with our cult mantra. On the seventh day of the week we wear white and gather for lengthy rituals of screaming yelling and dancing.

We walk around the streets and woods talking to "ourselves" (G-D). We spend a lot of time going around to graves, kissing and hugging them. We do daily meditations with our cult mantra Na Nach Nachma Nachman Muman. Before prayers we bind ourselves to our cult master Rebbe Nachman. We go on weekend retreats to graves of Ancient Talmudic personalities and sit there for hours muttering old texts.

We have cult vans that roam the streets of Israel with scores of our cult members dancing and distributing our propaganda. We wear holy amulets with copies of the name Na Nach Nachma Nachman Muman inside.

Everyday we spend time studying all the various ancient Jewish texts especially the Grand Code Book of Law that Rebbe Nachman said had to be studied every day. We also dedicate a large amount of time to studying the various texts of Breslov.

At least once a year every member of our cult must make the pilgrimage to the grave of our Grand Master Rebbe Nachman in Uman, Ukraine as well as to the grave of the "Holy Grandpa" Rabbi Yisroel Odeser.

Male members of our cult will not look at and talk to women. We do arranged marriges and our wives wear rags on their heads.

We will not subject ourselves to any fake rabbis who chase money and power, simply because they have a white beard and memorized a little Gomorrah. We completely and totally separate ourselves from fake erev rav American westernized watered down Judaism and declare that it has no say or influence on our lives.

Warning to all American parents, keep your children far away from the Nanach cult, that is if you can.


Anonymous said...

I think I heard of this cult before under a different name "religious jews"

Anonymous said...

this is very cool , how do I join?

ElimelechNanach said...

As a member of this cult I would like to say that all of this is true except on the the Seventh day it's more like singing and dancing rather than yelling, and not all members must make a pilgrimage one a year to Uman some don't go at all anymore since Saba said it is over. Na Nach Nachma Nachman Meuman

Anonymous said...

How do I get one of those cult mantra white skull caps?

NaaNaach said...

call Simcha Nanach 845 6944591

saba-noon said...

How can I be More Na Nach?

NaaNaach said...

more nanach? got me thinking more in hebrew would be מר, which is the gematria of the Roshai Taivos of Na Nach Nachmu Nachmun MayUman.

saba-noon said...

good one!